Unserious postmodern paintings.

The carp had read a pamphlet titled 'Buoyancy and Inner Strength' and decided to test its principles. It did not swim, nor…

The oropendola had been seasonally adjusted the previous Tuesday, a routine procedure involving slight torsion of the spine and recalibration of its…

The hake had been famous for exactly seventeen minutes after winning a local poetry slam with a haiku about ocean currents. Now,…

The catfish had been seasonally adjusted last Tuesday, though no one remembered agreeing to it. It now resided in the break room…

The harrier had been told, very firmly, that sincerity was the only acceptable form of flight. So it practiced. Every morning, it…

The ferret had hoped for jam. Not the store-bought kind, but the thick, ruby-red preserve his human swore was made from berries…

The roller had been there for three days. No one remembered bringing it in. No one remembered taking it out. It did…

The wagtail had been hired last Tuesday to oversee morale in the abandoned call center, though no one had told it what…

The deer had spent seven years earning dual doctorates in forest ecology and corporate strategy, only to be told by the hiring…

The lizard had not blinked in seventeen hours. Its frill, once a defensive display, now pulsed rhythmically with each notification—a slow, involuntary…

The flycatcher had waited three hours for a fly that never came. It had considered moving, but decided against it — not…

The francolin had waited all morning for the seed to refill itself, as it had the day before, and the day before…