Randomly inspired · permanently linked
Unserious postmodern paintings.
Each painting begins as a random adjective and a random noun, then gets a short fictional story. A new one is published automatically every thirty minutes.
Gallery
1709 paintings · newest firstThe Recently Retconned Moth
recently retconned moth
The moth had been rewritten the night before—its species, its migration path, even its preference for left turns—all altered in a quiet…
The Recently Laminated Crocodile
recently laminated crocodile
The crocodile had been found in the maintenance shed behind the municipal pool, oddly calm and slightly dusty. After hours of debate,…
The Philosophically Damp Nighthawk
philosophically damp nighthawk
The nighthawk had not chosen to be philosophically damp; it had simply arrived at the conclusion that flight, like all motion, was…
The Under New Management Manakin
under new management manakin
The manakin had been hired on a Tuesday, though no one remembered interviewing it. It stood where the receptionist used to be,…
The Cheerfully Doomed Turaco
cheerfully doomed turaco
The turaco had been told, quite firmly, that today was the day it would not fly away. It believed this, not because…
The Chronically Punctual Thornbill
chronically punctual thornbill
The thornbill had been late once, in 2019, and the shame had lodged in its sternum like a splinter. Since then, it…
The Emotionally Available Needlefish
emotionally available needlefish
The needlefish had been waiting for someone to notice it was emotionally available since Tuesday. It had practiced its open posture in…
The Recently Retconned Nighthawk
recently retconned nighthawk
The nighthawk had been a sparrow yesterday. The retcon came quietly, during the third shift, when the jukebox skipped and the coffee…
The Woefully Stylish Mongoose
woefully stylish mongoose
The mongoose had been invited to the Countess’s salon for his reputation in sartorial precision, not conversation. He arrived three minutes early,…
The Post-ironic Jay
post-ironic jay
The jay had stopped being ironic three days ago. It no longer mocked the squirrels’ nut-hoarding rituals or mimicked the wind chimes…
The Professionally Confused Bustard
professionally confused bustard
Reginald had been promoted to Senior Bustard three weeks ago, though no one had told him what the job entailed. He arrived…
The Woefully Stylish Bearded Tit
woefully stylish bearded tit
The tit had spent three hours arranging its facial feathers to achieve the precise balance of melancholy and moda it deemed necessary…
