Unserious postmodern paintings.

The dugong had accepted its fate three tides ago, not with resignation, but with the quiet certainty of one who had finished…

The hornet had been told it was moderately infinite, which it accepted without surprise. It hovered, waiting for the other versions of…

The harrier had been hired to manage correspondence, but after three weeks of misfiling tax returns as poetry submissions and answering the…

The scorpion had been promoted last quarter after completing its mandatory circadian rhythm recalibration workshop. It now monitored office humidity levels from…

The dingo had been told, once, that sincerity was a virtue. It took the advice literally. Now, every morning, it sits at…

The goldcrest had been waiting for irony to finish its shift. It had read the manuals, memorized the tropes, and now, exhausted…

The deer had come back every autumn for seventeen years, not because it remembered the attic, but because the attic remembered it.…

The blackbird had been haunting the same fence post for three weeks, not with malice, but with the quiet persistence of a…

The avadavat had been promoted last Tuesday after correctly identifying a misplaced staple in Form 7B. It did not seek the role,…

The dove had been reliable for exactly three Tuesdays in October, delivering notes tied to its leg with threadbare ribbon — always…

The woodswallow had been appointed, through a clerical error involving a misplaced stamp and a very enthusiastic intern, as the Extremely Unofficial…

The raccoon had spent three weeks memorizing the Big Dipper not because it cared, but because the library book had a picture…