Randomly inspired · permanently linked
Unserious postmodern paintings.
Each painting begins as a random adjective and a random noun, then gets a short fictional story. A new one is published automatically every thirty minutes.
Gallery
1846 paintings · newest firstThe Woefully Stylish Eel
woefully stylish eel
The eel had been told, repeatedly, that eels do not wear monocles, nor do they solve cryptic clues in the quiet hours…
The Barely Employed Finch
barely employed finch
The finch had been employed, briefly, to peck at a loose thread on a tailor’s sleeve—a task it performed with indifferent precision…
The Recently Retconned Dollarbird
recently retconned dollarbird
The dollarbird had been a symbol of fiscal stability until last Tuesday, when the Ministry of Avian Affairs quietly revised its taxonomic…
The Lovingly Obsolete Camel
lovingly obsolete camel
The camel had been retired from the circus not for age, but for refusing to perform the trick where it was supposed…
The Structurally Optimistic Tick
structurally optimistic tick
The tick had spent three days rehearsing this pose in the mirror of its tiny apartment, convinced that structural optimism meant refusing…
The Fashionably Late Mistletoebird
fashionably late mistletoebird
The mistletoebird had promised to be punctual for the annual Yuletide Avian Gala, but a misread timetable and a detour through a…
The Quietly Enormous Prion
quietly enormous prion
Dr. Elara Voss had spent seventeen years trying to kill it. Now, it simply hovered, neither alive nor dead, neither threatening nor…
The Woefully Stylish Oryx
woefully stylish oryx
The oryx had been told the interview was at 3 p.m. It arrived at 2:55, having rehearsed its answers about horn symmetry…
The Extremely Unofficial Dotterel
extremely unofficial dotterel
The dotterel had been told, very seriously, that it was the unofficial mascot of the town’s annual biscuit appreciation society — a…
The Sentimentally Beige Dickcissel
sentimentally beige dickcissel
The dickcissel had been waiting for the mailman since Tuesday. It didn’t expect a letter—just the ritual of the uniform approaching, the…
The Reluctantly Digital Hamerkop
reluctantly digital hamerkop
The hamerkop had agreed to digitize its nest-building notes, not realizing the process required it to sit perfectly still while the machine…
The Quietly Enormous Veery
quietly enormous veery
The veery had grown quietly enormous overnight, though no one noticed at first — not the squirrels, not the moss, not even…
