Unserious postmodern paintings.

The whelk had been left there by someone who forgot to take it home after lunch, though no one remembered bringing it…

The jaguar had been promised a spa day. Instead, it got a maintenance closet with a broken vent and a thermostat stuck…

The hoatzin had been promoted to Junior Form Inspector three weeks ago, though no one remembered voting for it. It arrived each…

The chough had arrived precisely at 7:03 a.m. for the thirteenth consecutive day, as it always did, and would continue to do,…

The monkey had been purchased on impulse during a liquidation sale at the closed-down pet emporium, priced low because it refused to…

The redstart had been waiting for the tea to cool. It didn’t mind the crack — it had seen worse. The cup,…

The harrier had been sold for three dollars at a garage sale labeled 'Misc. Bird-Like Objects.' It did not protest. It settled…

The duck had been loved once, in a time when love meant being kept clean and fed on schedule. Now it stood…

The avadavat had been promised promotion if it dressed for the part. It arrived at dawn, feathers carefully pressed, tie knotted with…

The stork had been promoted to Senior Logistics Coordinator after a clerical error in the Avian HR department. It didn’t know how…

The flycatcher had not eaten in three days, not from lack of flies, but because it had finally understood the quiet hum…

The kite had not flown in seventeen years, not since the boy who made it moved away and forgot to take it.…