Unserious postmodern paintings.

The louse had been waiting for the light to dim. It did not know why it was semi-liquid, only that the table…

The takahe had insisted on tea at precisely 4:17 p.m., though no one had offered. It poured the water itself, using its…

The aardvark had come for milk, as it did every Tuesday at precisely 3:17 p.m., though it never drank any. It simply…

The terrapin arrived precisely seventeen minutes after the appointed time, as it always did, having paused to admire the way the light…

The nilgai had been visiting this house every Tuesday for seventeen years, ever since the child who once fed it marmalade sandwiches…

The gecko had retired from active insect pursuit three years prior, opting instead for the quiet dignity of sun-warmed upholstery and the…

The coati had been waiting for the librarian to return with the overdue volume on Andean rodent etiquette. It had read the…

The chickadee had not asked to be this size, nor had it sought the quiet. It simply woke one morning to find…

The lizard had been hired for its ability to remain motionless for hours, a trait mistaken for focus. It hadn’t moved since…

The salmon had graduated top of its class from the Ivy League of Ichthyology, published three papers on upstream navigation efficiency, and…

The motmot had been giving advice for seventeen years, all of it technically correct and utterly useless. Today, it told the visiting…

The coal tit had inherited the coat from a departed uncle who swore it was worn at the coronation of a sparrow…